The first time I ever touched alcohol was when I was 16. I was leaving for college in the fall and had never gone near the stuff. Worried that I'd get to school and lose my shit, my parents sent me up to SUNY Plattsburgh to see my sister in order to engage in some controlled drinking. When I arrived my sister did my makeup and dressed me so that I'd look older, but not too old, and then we were off to the liquor store. I was left to wait in the car as she bought Red, White, and Blue wine, yes that was actually the name of it. We drove back to her house in excitement. The night was ours, and I was about to get hammered, repercussion free. After an evening of anticipation, it was time to drink. I was sitting on her bed as she blasted the top tunes of the day and poured me a mug of cheap wine. I momentarily panicked before taking a sip. As with anything new, I worried that I would have an allergic reaction to the alien elixir. After a few deep breaths and a mental pep talk, I finally built up enough courage and took a sip. God it was awful, it tasted like all the bad in the world had fallen into my mug. I almost spit it out in complete rejection. How could anyone drink enough of that shit to get drunk?
Grossed out but still determined, I forced myself to drink my mug of wine. It was a slow and painful process, but I knew what I had to do. By the time I saw the bottom of the mug I was hammered. It was the weirdest feeling in the world. I kept whipping my head back and forth, amazed with the delay and the heaviness the small cup had produced. I was thrilled, being drunk was like having a new fun toy.
I held out my mug just like Oliver and eagerly asked for some more. My sister happily obliged, and filled up my cup, and so I continued down my drunken path. After another 20 minutes of itunes and cheap wine heaven it was time to leave. Pregame completed, it was off to the rugby house, with real college boys, oh la la. Once we arrived at the house I was placed on the couch in front of the TV. In Hines sight, it was a virgin sacrifice, but at the time I felt so cool. I was drunk at a college, what could be better?
2 mugs of cheap wine down, I was ready for the harder stuff. My sister made me a mixed drink or 90% coke, and 10% Jack. I took one sip and the room began to spin. Being a drinking virgin, I had no idea what it meant for the room to spin. I thought I had just moved to the next level, I actually believed that I was just getting better at this.
As we sat on the couch, I slumped down, spilling my drink everywhere on everything, and to top it off, I was fading in and out of coherence. Finally, without warning, I just threw up. I threw up all over me, and the couch but I still didn't move. I just sat there hoping no one would notice. Much to my shock, everyone noticed and I was quickly whisked away to the bathroom where I continued to purge myself of the evil Red White and Blue.
Some girls at the party had a good laugh at my expense and my sister's then boyfriend had to clean it up wit a dust buster, not one of my finer moments. I'm just happy facebook didn't really exist at this point. 10 minutes later, sufficiently cleansed, I was carried home and put to bed. The next day I had a 6 hour car ride home and a hangover that would make a grown man cry. Overall it was a very educational weekend, I learned how to pregame, how to pace myself, and that I am a total pussy when it comes to alcohol.
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