In defense of being shallow

So yesterday was the first day of class. I had structure and style, or was it style and structure? No clue, but anyway I digress. In class we had to do that very annoying first day of class thing where we all sit in a circle and have to talk about ourselves like an AA meeting.

So we were all going around the room. Everyone was an experienced writer, each one cooler than the next, expressing their love for the written word and other authors, most of whom I have never heard of it. I think someone mentioned F. Scott Fitzgerald but that was the extent of it.

Anyway they get to me and I openly declare that I am a shallow 22 year old girl from middle-class America. Now admitting you're shallow to a bunch of writers is sort of like chumming the waters and then jumping in dressed as an injured seal. The Professor jumped on me within 2 seconds and then asked how other's felt about me being shallow. It was awkward, especially when one woman called it refreshing.

But here's the thing, every writer, every artist, every "intellectual," thinks that they're deep, and I would argue that if you think you're deep you most likely aren't. When you have actually seen some whose been to hell and back, it's hard to relate with "oh I totally get that, someone broke my heart."

The truth is, I gave up my dream career of peace work for writing and what's shallower than writing? You just chill out in your head all day. If that's not narcissism than I don't know what is.

The concept of being deep is manufactured and it doesn't really exist. I read books, follow politics and my favorite color is black, but I also really like the mall and smiling. If being deep is about being pretend tortured count me out. I'm only 22, my teenage angst won't be considered true character until I hit 25. Until then, I'll be at the mall.