The men of jersey shore

So I just finished watching last night's episode of the shore and wow, it's basically cast like a boy band. I mean yeah, they are all gorilla juice heads but each one has such a unique personality. I challenge any girl on the planet to watch the show and now fall in love with at least one of the boys. Hell! even Chloe Sevigny was spotted hanging with Pauly D. To be fair their true personalities didn't shine too bright until this season, thank you Mike for letting some of the others step into the light. Well here's the breakdown:

The Situation: Arguably the most famous of the jersey juice heads. He has a horrible face but his abs are INCREDIBLE. I would say he's the "Older brother of the band" comparable to Kevin from the Backstreet boys. He sorta calls the shots but he's not that cute or funny. In season one he totally took charge while the others fell into line. Even this season he is often seen taking on the paternal role of the house, taking care of poor Ronnie when he cries, cooking everyone dinner, and sounding the grenade whistle. Oh and not to mention, he's almost 30 and a total dick.

Vinny: Vinny is OBVIOUSLY the cute one. He is just so adorable, you want to take him home and cuddle, right snooks? He's totally sweet, loves his mother, and has a sensitive side. I'd be lying if I said I didn't have a total crush on him. And whose heart didn't break a little when he got stood up on a date in Miami? I mean he even bought her flowers! SWOON. Comparable to Nick in BSB

Pauly D: In my personal opinion, Pauly D is the heartthrob. I mean he sort of has that bad boy thing going for him, yet he is totally funny and pretty witty. "BURGERS FOR THE BOYS" "CABS ARE HERE" Ok maybe he's not witty, but he is totally funny. When I first laid eyes on him, I thought he was a total douche, but now I fall deeper and deeper in love with him each episode. If he ever cuts his hair, I'll cut my wrist. Comparable to Brian in the Backstreet boys.

Ronnie: Last but certainly not least we have Ronnie, the total bad boy in the group. He vowed never to fall in love at the Jersey Shore, which pretty much means he was desperate to find love at the Jersey Shore. When he fell in love with Sammi I was actually upset, would she actually be able to tame our man? Nope! he's still a total jerk, maybe it's the steroids? But to be fair he does have a sensitive side, he cried an awful lot this season then called his Daddy for emotional support. He's comparable to A.J.

Alright well they are one member short of actually being a boy band, but we'll let it slide because everyone knows that the last member of the band is forgettable anyway. I would love for any of these boys to take me out on a date. I'd even buy my antibiotics in advance. That's right Shore house, I'm a guarantee.