"If a girl sees you out with your lax wand, she knows you’re a Bro. Throw in some mid-calves and a pinnie, and you’re good to go. Lacrosse players also have reputations for having great parties around college campuses, so she’ll definitely want to be involved in some of your parties, too....If a girl knows you’re in a frat, she knows you have connections to get her into the good frat parties. Get her a few drinks and she’ll be swooning all over you all night. Simple as that."
Now, call me a loon, but when I see a Lax stick, I think they got cut from the football team and when I see frat letters I think they are probably really into sodomy and blaming homosexual encounters on being "so drunk bro," but I'm a pessimist so that could just be me. So using this article as inspiration, I will now write "The 10 biggest dick (as in jerk) magnets"
10. You know in the movie Clueless when Cher says, "sometimes you have to show some skin, this reminds boys of being naked, and then they think of sex." So true, so if you want boys to like you, show a lot of skin. They love this and then they will totally let you have sex with them.
9. Don't swear. Swearing is something that only belongs to boys. It's not attractive when girls use four letter words, we have no business dropping words like "fuck, cunt, shit, twat," These are big boy words.
8. Drink a lot. Boys like when you are passed out, it makes it easier for them to date rape you. If you drink enough, they won't even have to waste their roofies on you and this is a major bonus.
7. Don't drink. Ok yea this might be the exact opposite as the entry above, but boys also think it's really gross when girls drink too much. Then they can't take you home to mom and they will never love you, because drinking is a guy thing.
6. According to another brobible entry, boys will never want to hang out with you during daylight hours, which is fine. While they are busy hanging out with their buddies, you should spend these precious daylight hours working out, eating healthy, and doing your hair and makeup, that way by the time the boy is ready for you, you'll look perfect.
5. Dating girls is expensive, and boys don't really like that so do your best to have lot of money, but like it can't be your money, if it's your father's money, that's ideal. Then the boy won't feel threatened by your money making ability, which can be emasculating, but he also won't have to pay. Best of both worlds.
4. Boys don't want to talk about your friends, your job, your school. They also don't want you talking about sports, politics, economics, literature. These are topics for boys. Safe conversation topics are puppies, kittens and how handsome your man is.
3. I actually learned this from Cosmo, no seriously, girls shouldn't joke. Joking is a boy thing. I mean I suppose you could say a very politically correct, silly joke, but nothing too heavy, or else the boy will think you're trying to be his buddy, and he already has buddies. Besides, girls aren't funny.
2. Don't try to befriend his friends, thats weird. Just be pretty around his friends. Oh but don't worry, you can cook for them too.
1. I can't get too explicit because my parents read this site but....be self-less, it's all about him and if he's not happy you didn't do your job.
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